Thump Your Fears
By Dave Franzwa © 2004
If fear is crippling your ability to function, online or off?
Give it a black eye...
Are you a "just do it" type, or do you find yourself analyzing things to
the point that nothing gets done?
If you're in the latter category, that can be a frustrating position to be in,
and the linked article is definitely for you.
If you are a "just do it" type, you have an opportunity here to gain some valuable insight into those "analyzers" that tend to drive you nuts.
I was preparing a script the other day for a particular function that my wife needed on her website, and it struck me, "I've lost my focus... again!"
And it's been costing me big time.
Not just in revenue, but in something I value far more than that. It's been costing me time away from nurturing gifts and talents (yours and mine) and that's like saying to the giver of the gift, "Oh thanks. How nice," and then stuffing it in a drawer until the next time it sees the light of day. Which may be, well, maybe never.
What a shame that would be.
Let me back up just a bit and fill you in on a few details.
I've never been a "just do it" type of person. I always needed to anylize and justify the crap out of what I was planning to do.
Now there's nothing wrong with planning something out. It could have
been the engineer in me taking over, but I've also found that many times
procrastination disguises itself as "planning."
Ever been afraid to make a mistake? Yeah? Me too. So while I was anylizing, planning, tweaking, and adjusting, I was also burning rubber but getting nowhere fast.
Now, I don't know whether I was afraid of failure or success. I suspect the former. I just didn't want to look dumb, which I think was residuals from my "good old days" where you *always* had to look cool.
Some folks really are afraid to succeed, too. Somewhere down inside
they are aware that success will add to the responsibilities that they are accountable for. They will actually sabotage their own efforts when
nearing one of the goalposts of success, because they have been convinced that they don't deserve it.
That however, is an entire article of it's own.
Anyway, I do believe that there was a fear factor of some sort involved,
but I'm not going to take the time to anylize it here. All that's changed!
So what am I doing different?
I'm refusing to give the fear of anything any more power or satisfaction than it deserves.
It deserves none!
And I've gone back to my first love... writing. I've got buckets full of
words and emotions stored up that are just itching to get out.
Well, the dam has burst and here they come.
As I said, I've been working on a website for my wife. (If you'd like to check out that little project, you can find it at Puzlet Gems I'm pretty proud of it and her.) I'll continue helping her out as necessary, but as you can guess, it involved my learning a bunch of "techie stuff." I'll admit, it's been an interesting and rewarding experience, and I'll definitely be applying what I've learned, but in the words of a great and noble philosopher:
"It ain't writing."
(OK. So it was me who said that. It's true nonetheless. As well rounded as I may be, I am still a writer at heart.)
I had just gotten started writing with an online focus when "other things" came up that needed my attention. Granted, it was for a worthy effort. I'd do anything for my wife, but my forte is communicating via the written word. I've been told I'm a really good poet too. Maybe at some point I'll give that a shot online as well.
Someone a long time ago told me that there is more money created in
sales than any other endeavor. About that same time I learned that every act of communication with another human was a sales job of one sort or
another.
WE'VE BEEN SELLING SINCE WE WERE BORN
In fact it doesn't even have to involve another human. Take a dog, for instance:
"I'll pet you if you'll be my friend." Same goes for cats. Well, maybe not quite the same. It's more like, "I'll feed you if you'll hang out long enough to at least tell me if there are any mice in the house."
(I wouldn't want to push the friendship/loyalty issue with one of those
independant cusses.)
Along the way I figured as long as I'm going to be spending that much
time (a lifetime) practicing and participating in sales, I might as well make a
profession out of it.
So I am a marketer, but first and formost, I'm a writer.
Written communication is one of the best sales tools we have at our
disposal. If you can't communicate on paper (or word processor) you'll always be on the other side of the sales table. And that, my friend, gets expensive.
So I'm back at it. I'm writing to sell you on my opinions; on how I feel at any given time. I'm writing to communicate with you on whatever plane you and I can relate to each other on.
I find that one of the gifts given to me has an encouraging nature to it.
So many folks have a difficult time accepting their value and uniqueness.
Most, if not all the time, the reason for their reluctance to give themselves
any credit is wrapped around a fear of one sort or another.
And there are a multitude of fears out there. If you haven't had a chance to read my article on Power Phrases bookmark it now and check it out later. (Finish this article first, otherwise you'll have too much on your plate;-) That article deals with one method I employ to conquer fear. One of the power phrases that I left out of the article but is extremely effective at kicking fear's fanny around the block, is another thought that Jesus laid on us.
(Note: Not all of my power phrases are from the Bible. Some are rock phrases, some are from the likes of Mark Twain, Albert Einstein, and others. I use what works for me.) The phrase is: "In every test and trial you will also be provided a way of escape."
Fear is both a test and a trial, so I know there's a way of escape.
One of the greatest escapes from those fears that I've ever come across, is to tap into one of the gifts on my creative side. Writing. I get whatever fear I'm dealing with out in the open and exposed on paper. Fear hates exposure. Once it's been seen and recognised for the scrawny, manipulative, scaredy cat it is, it can't gather enough steam inside my head to hold a grip on me.
The problem may still be there, but the fear that was associated with it no longer has the ability to magnify and blow it out of proportion. This allows me to deal with the real problem, not the fear.
Your gift doesn't have to be writing, either. You can simply scribble some notes to yourself about what you're feeling and why you think you're feeling it. Think of it as a game. Put everything you can think of about your problem down on your paper. Then start picking out the parts that really don't have anything to do with the issue. What started as a gnarly, snarling, vicious looking critter with it's lips curled back on it's teeth, trying to get you to give up (Bad dog! Get down from there!) is now cut up into itty bitty, bite sized pieces. Not nearly so scarey now, is it?
The way I see it, if something I write strikes a chord with you, builds you
up, or increases your confidence level, then I've helped to beat fear down a notch or two. Let me tell you, there is nothing sweeter, or will boost your spirit more than springing a load of "thump" on your fears.
Fear loses - You win!
So, what are you doing? Are you spinning your wheels, getting lured in by every whisper of greener pastures which distract you and waste your
valuable time?
Are you developing the things that you do best? Do you even know
what your gifts and talents are? (Many don't.)
Are you operating in fear? If you're inner talk is a constant putdown, I can guarantee that you are.
Fear is an absolute crippler if you allow it to have it's way with you.
If so, shed some light on it. It will run for the darkness like the coward it really is. And I'll be cheering you on all the way to the finish line. Dave
*****************************************************************
Issues like these are what I focus on in "My Den." Come visit. Send for the key at: Key to the Den
You might be persuaded to invest in yourself while there. You deserve it. I also have tools for writing and development that I'm no where near ashamed to promote, and adding to as I see fit. Now's the time to lose your fear and "just do it"!
*****************************************************************
|
