08.13.06
Do You Write Your Web Copy For Humans… or Borgs?
It looks like I’m jumping into the tangled web of real content vs. search engine optimized copy.
I didn’t get involved in writing on the net to strike up a relationship with robots.
They’re dull-witted, have no manners, and could care less whether you or I have feelings.
I don’t know about you, but I don’t care much about playing games in which the rules constantly change. Wayyy too much for this wrinkled, old gray-matter to remember.
Even if I could remember, I was raised to believe that changing the rules mid-game is cheating, and I can’t say that I care much for cheaters either.
(By the way, watch who you choose as your banker in Monopoly;-)
With the ability of the major search engines, like Google, to change their search criteria and algorithms at the drop of a hat, that’s exactly the type of game I won’t play.
There are some folks out there that create software in an attempt to stay ahead of the search engines, or at least keep up with them, and that’s just fine, if that’s what they want to do.
Some of that content creation software is pretty cool, I’ll have to admit, but I’ll be darned if I’m going to dot my “t’s” and cross my “i’s” for the sake of a robot. Besides, Mom always said if I crossed my eyes, they might stick that way;-)
You see, a robot wouldn’t have caught, nor appreciated that little bit of fun with words, but humans would. (Most humans anyway.)
And that’s the point. If I can’t periodically entertain my readers, then there’s no sense in my doing this.
Fortunately, there are still readers who enjoy a sense of humor, and they are who I intend to keep writing for.
The internet was created for sharing information; that much goes without saying, but if the Borgs out there can’t even catch a little joke, then what other information are they judging as good when it is in fact, erroneous?
In Orson Wells’ classic “The War of The Worlds,” it was a common cold that brought on the downfall of an alien invasion.
Maybe it will be the simple joke that will be the ace up our sleeves in this war against robots that seek to sterilize all content of any trace of personality.
For all of you writing feverishly to please the labotomous Borgs of the worldwide web, continue to feed your masters if you like. I for one, will continue to relate to people who can choose to laugh at my jokes and forgive my mistakes, because it’s still not what you know (robots), it’s who you know (humans) that really counts in life.
Joke around a little. Be yourself. Poke fun at a robot occasionally; they won’t get it anyway, and I can prove it.
When you’re not sure whether you’re dealing with a robot or a human, simply say “knock, knock.”
If they don’t answer with the customary “who’s there” response, you know you’re dealing with a full-fledged, humorless, created-in-the-matrix robot.
If they do respond accordingly, you’ve got a live human on the other end, and they’re a lot easier to please.
But you’d better have a good punch line ready.
I have another one for you that the robots won’t get:
May the farce be with you.
Dave
(You’re welcome to use or distribute this article any way you choose, as long as you leave the above link intact. One of the few rules I use;^)